by Pierre le Roux
There is nothing more venomous than a bitter old queen with an axe to grind. They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but a rancorous queen with a vendetta and the morals and ethics of a crack whore who has run out of smack can be far more hazardous. Now throw Social Media into the mix and you have the perfect storm of bitchiness, slander, malicious gossip, debauchery and character assassination.
There are some seriously fucked up people out there. And yes y’all, there are also some really pissed off queens out there too who like nothing better than pissing on other people’s parades. Perhaps it is out of jealousy or maybe it is born from insecurity, who knows. Either way, some disgruntled self-hating queen recently decided to create a Facebook page called Gay Confessions SA and this caused some major unhappiness in the gay community mostly because it was utter smut, tried to create some controversy in the community, slandered some people (including myself) and was mostly based on anonymous lies. I know the LGBT community don’t always get a long, but seriously you guys? What the fuck is wrong with some people?
We all know that Social Media, apart from being an easy way to connect, also has its dark crevices where sinister motives lurk. Not everyone on Social Media is all rainbows and butterflies. Some people are callous and vindictive bullies. Now don’t fool yourself. It’s not only children who fall prey to cyber bullying, adults do as well. Only when it comes to adults the bullying is slightly more sophisticated and many times much more vicious. Not all cyber bullies have the guts to belittle, taunt and slander their victims in person. Some create fake profiles and recently a whole page was created solely for this purpose. Gay Confessions SA was conceived from a demented mind and was clearly aimed at discrediting and embarrassing certain members of the South African gay community. Its aim was to slander them disguised as “anonymous confessions” which was the perfect recipe to bring out the absolute worst in our community.
Now, is it just me who thinks that the person(s) behind that page and the participants thereof were cowards? I use the past tense because Facebook has shut down that page twice already for violating their terms of service, yet it resurfaces every time like a stubborn yeast infection. It is very easy to write insults, accusations and blatant lies in an “anonymous confession” without taking any responsibility for what you’re saying and/or not caring who you are hurting in the process. It’s easy to slander people and to assassinate their characters on line while hiding behind the anonymity of a faceless Facebook page that is devoid of any accountability. But what is in it for the perpetrators of these devious, baseless and malicious “confessions”? And what is in it for the creator of that page? What do they get out of it and what do they want to achieve?
Well, perhaps the answer is simple. I guess it makes them feel better about themselves and their mediocre lives. How sad and unfulfilling their lives must be that they feel compelled to live vicariously through others albeit in a very pitiable way. If you have to break others down to make yourself feel better, perhaps therapy might be in order or a dose of self-esteem. I know we in the LGBT community don’t always get along and that is fine. I mean you can’t like everyone you meet, right? But if there is someone that gets your tits in twist why not just ignore them? I mean really, I don’t like drinking banana milkshakes but I don’t force myself to drink one just so that I can tell everybody how bad it tastes. So why do it with people you dislike. Sure some people are assholes and that is why I avoid them. Why can’t other people do the same?
I must be honest; I also do like the odd bit of gossip every now and again. I most certainly am not above that. I do listen to it and I also sometimes participate in it. But there is a line that should not be crossed and Gay Confessions clearly crossed that line. For one, I not only blame the creator(s) of that page for the damage they are doing to our community I also blame the people who liked and participated in that page: The people who submit their anonymous confessions and the people who consume and enable the loathsomeness which was that page. You are part of the problem. Do you even realize that? Maybe you should ask yourself this: if some of those posts were about you would you still be happily supporting that page? If you read shit about yourself that is not true, would you be fine with it? If you answered NO to any of these questions, why should other people be?
As for whoever’s brainchild this Gay Confession Page is/was , you are a pathetic asshole. And I mean that with all the contempt it deserves. If you find joy in slandering people and doing it either for the fun of it or to settle some scores you should take a long hard look at your own life. Are you proud of who and what you are? Are you proud of what you have become? Do you find delight in breaking people down? You are putting out so much negativity into the world all of which will eventually come back to you. Perhaps it is time that you stop fucking with other people’s lives and start focusing on having one of your own. You know, like in the real world and not on your fucking computer. Some fresh air might just do you some good.
Yes, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned but a disgruntled old queen can be far more dangerous. Unfortunately, the gay community is full of jealous people and we so do like to fight amongst ourselves, don’t we? It is pathetic really. This Facebook page embodied everything in the LGBT community that I dislike and even though I cannot be sure that it will not resurface again but if it does and you reading this are one of the people who participated in it, I only hope you realize what it says about you. I know that we in the LGBT community cannot all get a long but can’t we just stop being such bitches and mind our own fucking business for once? How can we expect the rest of the world to respect us if we cannot even respect each other? Maybe next time when we have a Gay Pride we should stop and really think for a moment about what that means. Are we really “proud” to be a member of the LGBT community when we treat one another like this?
Till next time.